Weeping cleanses the soul but pride won't permit them to fall. The soul needs a release from bottled up anguish. The dissatisfaction of not celebrating the freedom it once knew. It's now confounded by laws. Precepts that dictate what is considered deviant and what is permissible.

Some infirmities of the soul are self inflicted wounds, but nevertheless they are just as hard to heal. The inner desires are even harder to ignore. Their intensity increases daily. The tangible presence of the denied is nauseating. Understanding self discipline is acceptable but flaunting the object of obsession is all together different.

When fatigue wins acceptance of the inevitable is not far behind. One could fight but the defeat would be too embarassing and the rejection would take years to recover from.